The (far less than) 100 Things that Disappear with 2010: Part XVIII - XXII

Here are just a few more saying that irk me. Some more than others, but that will all be a thing of the past. 2011 is going to be a very good year for my ears.

This is Part Two

"Get in the HOLE!"

I don't watch golf. And I don't believe anyone actually does outside of patrons of restaurants and bars. However, I do believe people to have televised golf playing while they nap. And why not? You'll be out like a light as soon as you turn on the PGA.....


Sorry, I seemed to have dozed off there for a second. Back to the typing.


If I ever hear someone say "Get in the hole!" following teeing off while playing, watching golf on TV or in person I will hit them. Such an event has never happened. But if it ever does....

2010 response:  No response. The closest I've ever been to someone say that is in my chair while watching "SportsCenter".

2011 response: Fisticuffs. 

"Simular"

Nope. That's not a typo. And if you haven't caught the error yet, be concerned. I am hearing people say "simular" more and more these days. People, the word is SIMILAR. You don't have to support me in all of my opinions or grievances, but please help me with this one. Stop letting people propitiate this simple mistake. To me, this is the spoken equivalent of watching "Pink Flamingos". It pains me. Deeply.

2010 response: Cringing.

2011 response: I will correct everyone I hear say "simular" unless I am getting paid not to do so. 

"I just threw up in my mouth."


First off, that's just gross. Go brush your teeth, sicko. When you get back, we'll talk about why you have to be disgusting in public. Oh, you weren't serious? You didn't actually mean it? I see. Well, "Dodgeball" came out in 2004. Don't tell me. You're kind of a big deal and you have many leather bound books, too. I thought so.


2010 response: I didn't do anything. Honestly, it doesn't bother me too much. It's just time to move on. It's been six years.


2011 response: I'll have pamphlets on the ready which discuss GERD in detail so as to help someone with their affliction.

"I'm not going to lie..."


When someone says this to me, I can't help but think that everything they said before without first prefacing that they indeed were not lying to me could possibly be a lie. Luckily, I am hearing this less often now. This could be due to the distinct possibility that I could actually be difficult to engage in conversation with.


Nah...


2010 response: "You're not? Oh, good." , "What about all the other things you said before?", or some other smart assed response.


2011 response: I may just disagree with the the person before they even finish their sentence. That, or I may just reply, "I might lie to you but..."

And the one that will be the hardest for me to alter my response...

"Literally"

I'm not going to quote a dictionary just to copy/paste the actual, LITERAL definition of the word. Everyone has access to the dictionary.com or the old fashioned version-an actual dictionary. 


This word should be used to establish a truth in an almost unbelievable situation. It should be used to ensure the listener or reader that although the circumstances may seem hyperbolic, it is quite the opposite. So saying you were literally just sitting there is overstating the obvious. I can't go in to how often 'literally' is used incorrectly. Thinking about this topic drains me. 


Also, if you are going to say the word make sure you pronounce the 't'. It isn't 'lideral'.


2010 response: I would comment whether or not the word was used properly.


2011 response: I'm giving it up. No more corrections or comments. If I hear it used incorrectly, I'll just pay attention less.